I clean up pretty well. No one would think of me as a violent person. I don’t fly off the handle; I don’t cuss at people–even when I’m driving; I don’t ‘rage’. But… I know what goes on in my head/heart. Jesus’ list of defiling actions and attitudes that come from the heart (Mark 7:14-22) included things that I seldom struggle with. However, I was not happy to see “arrogance” on the list. I struggle with what my wife has cleverly identified as, “the Ray Way”. I know best; I have the better ideas; my way is more efficient, more effective; my aesthetics are more refined, more creative. (Even as I write this, I’m thinking, “I’m pretty dang eloquent!”) I am a pompous ass. And in my smug superiority, I dismiss, demean, belittle, berate. I control, coerce, manipulate, violate. I am the Pharisee that stands in judgment over the tax collector, thanking God that I’m not like him and submitting my list of spiritual and social credentials as evidence of my superiority.
On this Ash Wednesday, I confess: O God, be merciful to me a sinner. Create in my a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
Tongue on Fire 